Dear Guy Who Brings His Bike On The Train,
Why do you insist on bringing your bike on the train? Can't you tell it's rush hour? We're already packed in tight enough that we know what each other's deoderants smell like because the city routes every freaking bus that would normally go downtown to the light rail. Hauling that piece of junk on with you is not doing anyone any favors. I have to ask, if you have a bike why are not riding it? Is it just another accesory piece like your filthy messenger bag to complete your quirky guy I'm-not-a-hipster-but-I-really-am status. "Oh hey, look at me, I ride my bike to work because I'm soooo cool." No, more like you ride the train to work and bring that pink piece P.O.S. with you. You're not cool, you're just inconsiderate of your fellow transit riders. And what's the deal with pink? Like I don't notice you when your tire is scuffing up my Aldos, you have to go and have a pink bike? I find it difficult to believe you have to be downtown at this hour. What job could you possibly have downtown where you get away with dressing like that? You smell like window pizza. Now get off at the next stop and ride the pink bike the rest of the way please!
Sent from my iPhone.