3/7/11

RE: I'm So Uncool: A Few Things I’m Not Supposed To Like, But Do.




















Female Pop Vocalists
Lady Gaga, Christina Aguilera, Beyonce… I love the lot of ‘em. I have a soft spot for pop music in general, but the girls really got it going on. There still some stuff that’s absolute shit, like that trashy bitch with the dollar sign in her name. But sometimes I just crave over-produced mindless melodies.

Seal
Confession: Kiss From a Rose is one of my favorite songs ever. I’m terribly embarrassed by this fact and I try to mask my joy whenever I hear that song on the radio in public.

McDonald’s
I love food. I love good food. I love going to local restaurants where you know the cooks actually care about what they’re doing and are trying their damnedest to give you the best possible meal they can. But much like my cravings for sugary pop music, I crave empty calories and a patty made from bits of hundreds of cows. Yeah, I’ve watched those movies about how McDonald’s kidnaps your children and force feeds them happy meals until they get diabetes. Whatever. I don’t eat McDonald’s every day, but when I do it is damn delicious. Don’t even get me started on Taco Bell… but TB’s kinda cool, right?

Men In Their Late 30s
Yeah, I probably shouldn’t date dudes who graduated high school in the early 90s, but I do anyways. My rule is nobody over 40, but I tend to break that occasionally. Actually, I’m starting to get up there in years myself, so it probably isn’t as weird as it was a few years ago. What are guys that age doing messing around with 24 year old girls anyways? Perverts. Truth be told, the older fellows I mess around with are total losers most of the time, but I never said I had good taste in men.

Gay Porn
I’m a straight girl. Logic would conclude that I would watch straight porn. Then again, girls are supposed to think that porn is icky, right? I’m not like most girls. Gay porn is awesome because the more dick the merrier! Bears and leather daddies are fucking hot. Oh god, hairy guys… yessss.

On that note I think I’m gonna jill off and find some cheap shitty food.

-Doomgoblin
I'm Faster Than My Shadow

3 comments:

  1. The thing about Mickey D's is that as bad as it is for you, you still want. It's worse than crack and I've smoked a lot of crack in my day so I should know. I need a McChicken STAT! Hold the gay porn.

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  2. In cas you haven't been paying attention, thirty something men have been the cool thing for a few a while now. So I thik you're ok liking them. Seal though? REALLY?!

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  3. Who, me? What'd I ever do you? Go eat a Big Mac fat a$$.

    ReplyDelete