Our girl Doomy is contributing enough stuff that we're not titling it Reader Submitted anymore. She's pretty much a member of the team at this point. Well anyway, this time she took the advice of something an anonymous internet commenter said about not feeling pressure "to write to lowbrow humor or ironic sexism to impress us"...and still ended up impressing us.
This is meant to be an homage to a spoken word cassette tape my friend Levi gave me in maybe 2002. I can't remember the girl's name nor can I find the tape. She was all punk rock and told stories about being a punk in 70s and 80s New York or LA. It was pretty cool. She had some weird name like Patience or Melody or something...
Contents of My Purse, Post-Iowa
Wallet containing six dollars and some odd change.
Cell phone, mostly dead.
Half a pack of camel light.
Black Bic pen.
Burt's Bees beeswax lip balm.
Toffifay candy, one left.
Toothbrush and toothpaste.
Burned copy of "Egowar" by Audio Bullys and "Attention" by Les Maledictus Sound
Roll of quarters.
A set of size 3 double point knitting needles.
One white lighter.
Two bottle caps
UPDATE: Whoa, no idea how I remembered this, but the tape was Ruined by Pleasant Gehman!
I'm Faster Than My Shadow