Record Review: Get Rad-Choose Your Own Adventure 7"

Get Rad-Choose Your Own Adventure 7" (Halo of Flies)
By Nathan G. O'Brien on Scene Point Blank

...Being made of concrete would be kind of be the opposite of rad though, which is weird because rad is kind of exactly what these guys want you to get. I mean it would be cool if you got in a fight or something. Your opponent would have to be made of jackhammer or ten years of bad weather to fuck you up. But if you wanted to cuddle with your sweetie, it would probably be really uncomfortable for them. And as much as fighting rules, cuddling is like, a million times better.  ...read entire review after the jump!


RE: I'm So Uncool: Things I Normally Like But Are Sort Of Pissing Me Off Lately

Well it's time for another installment of I'm So Uncool.  A series in which we list things we like/don't like/could care less about/have strong opinions about etc., etc.  As always, we welcome any and all contributions.  Send yours to I'm So Uncool at bnb@hotdogdayz.com.  In the meantime, here are some things I normally like but are sort of pissing me off lately...

Chicken Breast
There are not of options for eating clean.  You got your green veggies, citrus fruits, almonds, egg whites, whey, and lean proteins.  Lean proteins are basically limited to poultry, fish, and cuts of beef with "top" and/or "round" in the name.  Well, you're not supposed to eat fish more than a couple times a week because of mercury levels and shit, and beef even less.  Which leaves you with poultry the majority of the time.  And let's be honest, poultry basically means chicken.  (Yeah, I know about turkey dumbass, but I'm not talking about nitrate-filled deli meats here; I'm talking about healthy yet economical choices.)  The leanest part of the chicken is the breast, and if you want to keep it that way there are limited ways in which you can prepare it.  So it boils down to that old too-much-of-a-good-thing thing.  Chicken breast, you're one of my favs, but you're monopolizing the clean eating world and that shit is really harshing my gig.

Georges St. Pierre
GSP is the current UFC welterweight champion and one of my favorite fighters ever.  However his last, oh I don't know, million fights have been total snoozefests.  Yes he pretty much dominates everyone he steps in the octagon with but he never seems to go for the finish.  Instead, opting for the unanimous five round decision.  Whether he's out-striking his opponent on the feat or imposing his will in a twentyfive minute humpfest on the ground, he's putting people to sleep.  And where he used to cut passionate post-fight promos, now he just apologizes for being, well, boring.  Georges, you're the man, but goddammit finish someone already!  You're really frustrating the shit out of me.  Also, if you're gay, just admit it.  Trust me, that would be the most badass thing in the history of MMA.

Justin Theroux
Yeah, I know that as a punk I'm supposed to hate Justin Theroux because he wears a Crass shirt to Starbucks in Maibu with his gf Jennifer Aniston and shows up at Hollywood celebrity functions in a patched-up jean vest and mismatched Nikes. Yep, he dares to break the cardinal rule: you can't be both rich & famous AND punk. He must not know that punks are supposed to hate money and success or whatever. Anyway, he had a photo spread in last month's GQ in which he sported two things I extremely dislike: '70s-style gear and a cigarette in his mouth. Justin, I like you but that shit pissed me off.  The'70s is the decade that fashion forgot about, and smoking, well that's just fucking stupid.

Popcorn, you're the best. You're reliable and comfortable, and you have the uncanny ability to make the worst movie watchable or the shittiest bar tolerable. I sincerely love you. But here's the deal: you're always stuck in my teeth and you affect my bowel movements in a really weird way. It's kind of pissing me off.

Runner's Up: CM Punk, Red Hot Chili Peppers, local Hip Hop, The Vikings, The NBA



Scene Report: Anthrax and Testament live at First Ave

Anthrax, Testament, and Death Angel live, First Avenue, Mpls, MN, 10/16/11

You know sometimes rock stars can really be little bitches.  Such was the case this past Sunday evening when Anthrax drummer Charlie Benante threw a sound check hissy fit that resulted in a forty minute start delay.  All because his kit was off by a matter of what could only be the smallest unit of measurement ever invented.  Listen up band dudes; the audience doesn't give a flying fuck if shit doesn't sound/feel/look good to you up there on that big, big stage.  It's all about us, the $30+ ticket price-paying audience down here.  And what we want is for it to be loud, fast, and in our face.  Now you might like to tell yourself that the reason you're a stickler for perfection is because you want us to be receiving the best possible product as a customer, but we all know that's total bullshit.  You're being an asshole because you're a "musician" now or whatever and you care about "subtle nuances" and shit.  Well we don't.  We didn't come to see Dream Theater, we came to see some fucking thrash.  But I digress...

Death Angel
Aside from the lead singer Rob Osegueda's lengthy dreads, they were pretty unimpressive.  In fact they kind of sucked.  Which hurts to admit, seeing as how I rocked Frolic Through the Park on the regular back in like, '88.  But then again, not totally surprising, considering the only remaining guys from that lineup are Osegueda and guitarist Rob Cavestany.  The latter of which, I hadn't seen in roughly eighteen years--back when he and Frolic-era bandmates (sans Osegueda) were in a band called The Organization.  Their tour with Muzza Chunka made a stop at the Mirage Nightclub in south Mpls.  So in retrospect, I guess that's kinda cool.

Not only does Chuck Billy have one of the goofiest names in heavy metal, he has a redonkulous habit of playing air guitar on his microphone stand.  And it's not just any old microphone stand.  It's a customized half mic stand that lights up in different colors throughout the set.  I normally get really annoyed by lead singers who play air guitar but that fact that Testament rips so damn hard, kind of cancels out the ridiculousness.  These guys played a long time and it was loud and just perfect.  They did a career-spanning set that included some of their fan favorite stuff from The Ritual and "Do or Die" from their excellent first album The Legacy, as well as some songs from the upcoming record The Dark Roots of Earth.  Which I am now looking forward to with great anticipation.  They almost stole the show.  Almost.

After seeing Anthrax a few years ago on the Spreading the Disease reunion tour, I knew there was no way--should I be in the vicinity--that I was ever going to miss a Joey Belladonna-fronted version of Anthrax again.  So I was psyched, to say the least, to hear the news that Belladonna had once again rejoined with his old bandmates to not only tour, but record an album.  And that album--Worship Music--turned out to be one of the year's best records in any genre, let alone heavy metal.  The same can be said for this tour.  As a live act, Anthrax is one of the year's best to come through.  Aside from Benante's apparent crabbiness, the crew looked to be enjoying themselves just as much as us thrashers in the audience.  Lead axe Rob Caggiano--who produced Worship Music--isn't much for showmanship but he really rips.  He mostly just stands there, wide-legged, with a smug look on his face like, "Yeah, I'm really fucking good, and I'm in Anthrax.  You should probably suck my dick now."  Bassist Frank Bello is quite possibly the most excited man to ever play in a thrash band.  He moves about the stage with ferocity of a guy half his age, all while grinning ear-to-ear.  Belladonna makes full use of the entire stage as well.  He looks to be fully rejuvenated in his return to the band.  On more than one occasion he mentioned being a diehard Vinkings fan.  In typical Minnesota fashion, this news was met a less than desirable reaction.  I mean, we did just lose to the Bears a mear hour before so I'm not sure what he was expecting.  Of course, Scott Ian did his signature bald-guy headbang throughout the entirety of the show.  All the guys wore matching shirts, which was kind of laughable, but whatevs.  They're Anthrax; they can do whatever they want.  And what they wanted to do was thrash our faces off.  A task in which they succeeded.  The ratio of old songs to new was about 60% old, 40% new.  Despite several pleading cries from the audience they did not play "I'm the Man."  Clearly, that shit is too goofy for the Anthrax that exists today.


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Record Review: The Cool Kids-When Fish Ride Bicycles

The Cool Kids-When Fish Ride Bicycles (Green Label Sound)
By Nathan G. O'Brien on Scene Point Blank*

The funny thing about the Cool Kids is that even though they rely heavily on throwback overtones, sometimes they sound ironically out of date.  Not out of date as in fifteen years, but like, as in two years.  For example, a joint like “GMC”, with its standard CK minimalist approach,  comes off like the soundtrack to a 2009 YouTube jerkin’ video...their most successful attempt at genre-bending happens on “Boomin.’”  The track is ripe with catchy synths reminiscent of early Minneapolis funk pioneers like The Time, Mazarati, Tamara and other Prince-related players. 
...click here for full review.

*Orginally published in The Soda Killers zine, availble worldwide now!
Email andersdinero@yahoo.com or bnb@hotdogdayz.com for more info.


Record Review: Anthrax-Worship Music

Anthrax-Worship Music (Megaforce/Nuclear Blast)
By Nathan G. O'Brien on Scene Point Blank*

One of the high points of the album is “Judas Priest.”  While it’s unclear if this is actually a tribute to Rob Halford and co., it most certainly is an ode to heavy metal...If while listening to this song you don’t plant one foot forward, bend at the knee until your back leg is straight, then proceed to bang your head and play air-guitar, I will personally come to your house, confiscate your Metal Card, and revoke your club membership on the spot.  ...read full review after the jump.

*Orginally published in The Soda Killers zine, available worldwide now!  Email andersdinero@yahoo.com or bnb@hotdogdayz.com